Rebecca Runs: 10 Things I Hate About Running

I went for zero runs this week. Zero.

I considered running home from the Business Awards on Saturday night in my heels just so I could blog about one run at least. But then I remembered I’m not a 19 year old uni student anymore. Long story short – I’m never drinking again. Which actually means this week wasn’t a complete waste of time, because I think that sobriety will probably enhance my running game.

So that’s all I’ve really got for you. Except this list of 10 things I hate about running that I’ve previously prepared (which in many ways makes me feel better about this “not running” business this week):

Ten things I hate about running:

  1. Running. Just actually running is the worst thing about running. I don’t even think it’s natural.
  2. It hurts. Even when you don’t try that hard.  This is why running has a bad reputation and people hate it. Running should adapt to popular opinion.
  3. Hills. And flats too, actually. Down is better.
  4. When your running pace is as fast as some people’s walking pace. That is a slap in the face. I mean, why bother? You look ridiculous.
  5. The shower at work. There is only one of them and it’s cold. It’s a Health and Safety issue and I’m taking it further. (Ok, it was cold once. But it was traumatic and I’m not ready to let it go).
  6. Being an adult. And having responsibilities like children and a job. All this means is that you can’t run when you want to, when you feel most energised to. Like in the morning, for example. Because you haven’t slept through the night for 7 years. And now there’s not enough coffee in the world to get you out the door on a run, back again, and made to look somewhat professional in time for work.
  7. ALL of this body. It’s quite a bit of extra weight to lug around at speed.  It probably looks about as comfortable as it feels all tucked into active-wear made out of plastic bottles found in the ocean.  Sure this body has been stretched and ripped apart in all sorts of directions over the years, brewing, birthing and sustaining three babies.  I haven’t looked after the old girl that well either, for a long time now. I haven’t loved her, or nourished her, or moved her with joy. Rather, I’ve resented her, ignored her, and moved her because I hate her. And so this is the material I’ve got to work with now. I suspect unpacking this a bit may unlock my running journey a little. So watch this space.
  8. Being cold. Because of the single shower at work, we’re often left to marinate in our sweat around the office while we wait our turn. Jerseys would help. But that’s just more to stuff into my bike basket for work and I’m well-over capacity already. (Speaking of jerseys, a fun-fact: I was actually almost set up on blind date with David Bain. Like actually. It was like ten years ago when I was a teacher and a colleague of mine was in a pony club with him. Apparently he was really nice but I decided to play it safe. And I stand by that decision).
  9. The ugly. There is so much ugly face that goes on during and after a run. For me, my paleness transitions to some other level of translucency, and then I get this redness around my eyes like Panda eyes, but red. It’s actually a sign of a decent exertion on my behalf, but it makes my colleagues genuinely concerned for my life when I’m marinating around the office.
  10. Boobs. They can make running painful and/or put you at risk of a head injury, so investment in a decent sports bra is essential. And expensive. So there shouldn’t be GST on them. That’s my 2 cents anyway.

And with that I’m off for a run. Because despite that list, I kind of want to. So weird…

– Rebecca Mackay

Rebecca will be writing weekly as she continues her journey to achieving her goal of completing the 18km Tois Challenge. Check in next Tuesday for her next article.

Read Rebecca’s article from last week here:

Rebecca Runs: Crisis Averted

And all her previous articles are stored here:

http://www.coachray.nz/category/client-stories/rebecca-runs/

 

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